Reflections of the Kingdom

Back to Blogging... ?

2010-05-08T22:24:00.004-05:00

It has been a while since I've written. Perhaps I will take up the pen once more... or the typing keyboard as the case may be. To reflect. To listen. To remember. To live life more fully...

More than anything in this world, my heart longs to know God more. To never give up the pursuit of the One who has pursued me for eternity. Before the foundations of the world, God knew me. God knew just how sinful and selfish I would be, and yet He still chose to create me and to love me. Jesus Christ died for my sins -- past, present, and future-- and turned away God's just anger from me. Jesus rose from the dead, restoring hope so that I could be made completely perfect and blameless. When God sees me now, He doesn't see my sin. He sees the perfect life of Jesus who lived the life I couldn't live, died the death I deserved, and now lives eternally - as I will! I am so glad that God has not given me what I deserve - I deserved death and hell, and yet God has given me life and eternity with Him!

It does seem that God continues to keep teaching me the same things over and over again: Cease striving. Remain in Christ. Trust in the all-sufficiency of Christ alone. Rest. Love. Let go. Press on to know the Lord. Be still. Run with all you've got. Work according to the power of God's Spirit within you. Don't be anxious. Believe the gospel. Preach the gospel to yourself, and keep preaching it - for in it is life.

Yet so often I live in fear, am plagued by self-doubt, and don't really believe this good news applies to the details of my life. The hardest work of all is to simply believe the gospel. To believe that God loves us. To receive that love and to stop trying to earn it. It is a gift. It is a scandelous gospel - freedom from the pressure to perform, freedom from duty, and freedom to fail. Freedom to be unrecognized, freedom to die to self, freedom to live for others. It is a call to come to the end of one's self-efforts, and to trust the Holy Spirit to do what we cannot. And at the end of the day to realize that knowing Jesus really is enough. Everything in life is uncertain except for this one fact: God is who God is, and God is good. I can trust Him.

Mundane Con't

2008-10-06T14:29:00.003-05:00

"As we consier the life we live compared to the fiery expectations we had in our college days we are suprised how mundane life is. It takes so much effort just to surve here. Between daily needs and homeschooling our days are nearly over." - A friend on a remote island in south asia

I read the above in a prayer letter recently... he continued, "Yet at the same time, in the light of Christ's awesome sacrifice, if we give our lives to carry His glory to this place it is the very least we can do." And concluded, "sometimes it seems unproductive, but as we stand God works."

Spectacular missionary stories come in the midst of lots of mundane, and are often the accumulation of mundane moments lived in faithfulness. As we stand firm in His grace, we can trust that God will lead us on His Mission. Again, transforming mundane moments into divine appointments... by HIS grace and for His GLORY.

Mysteriously Mundane Miracles

2008-10-04T13:51:00.006-05:00

"Words belong to the Lord... If God doesn't rule your mundane, He doesn't rule you. You live your life in the mundane." - Paul Tripp

You live your life in the mundane... Quite a thought. So often I'm looking for the spectacular, chasing after something fulfilling, thrilling, and larger than myself. If I had my way, every day I would want to change the world.

And herein lies the mystery of the mundane. The mundane seems so monotonous and meaningless... the same old same old. As wise Solomon said, "There is nothing new under the sun." You live your life in the mundane... conversations, e-mails, laundry, making food, activities of your day, eating, sleeping, reading, running, praying... Our daily activities are really not that different. What makes them different? Can God work in such little things for the glory of His Name? Is the miraculous possible in the mundane?

And yet, to find joy in the simple things of life is a gift. If you cannot enjoy your life now, you cannot enjoy life. The heart's longings are too deep to be satisfied with anything less than the mystery of being known and knowing, loved by and loving the very God who created us.

Jesus Christ took upon himself the wrath of God and died on a cross, paying the penalty of my sin, because He loved me... and that mysterious miracle gives meaning to otherwise mundane existence. My life is a gift, and the new life I found in Him an ever greater gift.

So every day I'm dying and living... dying to self, living to God. Nothing is no longer insignificant; every aspect of my life has significance. For I am united with Christ; this brings me so much hope for things to come. My worst days are never beyond the reach of his grace, and my best days are never beyond the need of his grace. This is the miracle of the mundane -- the Holy Spirit changing our hearts each day to be a little more like Christ, restoring us as sons and daughters of the Most High King.

"Everything I have is yours..."

2008-09-29T21:16:00.004-05:00

When I was young, I remember my dad telling us... "I wish that the church today functioned like the church in Acts, where they held all things in common." He wasn't being critical, just reflective... My dad continued, "I hope that at least our family could work like that, sharing all things and not owning anything."

And then my dad looked at me and said, "Everything I have is yours... You know that."

These words have stayed with me, "Everything I have is yours..." And they weren't just words; he meant them. My dad is one of the most frugal and generous people I know.

Right now, with the economy, there is a lot of anxiety about what will happen to our finances. I know a lot of people are in tight places and that there will need to be sacrifices in the days ahead. The downward turn should not come as a suprise to us... we've been a nation living on debt for as long as I can remember; we are reaping the consequences of many levels of greed.

But, as I think about all of that, a hope and excitement rises within me. While these consequences will be harsh, the opportunities are boundless... We will need to rely more deeply on God and more deeply on one another... real community, real sacrifice, real love, real life! The mercies of God are new every morning; great is His faithfulness!

So before you panic about the economy... remember we have a God who has a Father's heart exponetially more generous and loving than the best of earthly fathers. God loved us so much that He sent his only Son to pay the consequences for our sin and rebellion. And the consequences of our sin were far worse than a bad economy -- they condemn us to hell and the wrath of God. Surely the God who has made provision for the greatest sin and debt of mankind, will still be near to those who seek Him. Do you know Him as your Savior?

God is our Father, and Fathers love to give good gifts to their children... He is Jehovah Jirah, the God who provides. I am looking forward to seeing how God will glorify Himself in the coming days... and what He will teach our hearts as we learn to trust Him more deeply.

God

2008-09-28T22:53:00.006-05:00

Last month, I took a solitude retreat for a several days... I read through the book of Romans aloud, and then I started studying it chapter by chapter. At times I would walk around the lake, or retreat to the chapel and sing... sometimes praise, and sometimes songs of theological musings and questionings. There are many things about God that are had for me to understand. Oh the depth of the wrath and mercy of God!

God is not who I think He is... how I long to know Him more deeply! And for words to articulate the wonder of who He is!

Taco Bell... A Conversation

2008-04-07T21:07:00.004-05:00

One of the things Ritzer talks about in his book is the globalization of nothing... Mass communication has replaced personal relationships, fast food instead of real dining, scripted conversations, etc... So, on Sunday I went to Taco Bell for lunch with a friend.

I asked the lady, "How are you?"

She responded, "What can I get for you?"
(Thought: Oh no! Scripted conversation... it's like talking to a machine)

I ask, "What do you recommend?"
(let's see if I can get her off the script... also honestly having an indecisive moment)

Response, "Oh, everything is good here."
(Hmm... is that script or her talking??)

I order something... a bit frustrated that normal conversation is impossible. There is no one else in the building except for us, so I wouldn't even be holding up the line... I think to myself, so this is life... talking with other human beings without really saying anything.

And then, in one last attempt, I asked some questions... "How do you say your name? How long have you been with Taco Bell? Do you like it? I see you're a team leader...what does that mean?"

And she responded and started telling me about herself, where she was from, what her job is like, and how she would like to be manager someday... it was great!!

Communication had moved to conversation -- victory!

So, this is my new little challenge: see if you can throw people off their scripts. If a telemarker calls, try to get them talking about something else other than what they called about. Try to learn something about the lady at the grocery store instead of just letting her bag your groceries. People are more important than their services or their jobs... Let's take some time to get to now them... to love them for who they are and not what they do.

McDonaldization... and the Kingdom

2008-04-07T20:48:00.003-05:00

The core values of McDonald's include:
(according to Ritzer 2007:24-25 in The Globilization of Nothing 2...)

Efficiency - discover the optimum means for doing every process as quickly as possible.
Predictability - products and services need to be the same.
Calculability - quanity more important than quality... (fast and cheap)
Control (often through using nonhuman technology such as drive throughs and other mechanics control employees)

So... i've been thinking... how many of my values have been influenced by McDonalds? What are the values of the Kingdom of God? Just at a surface glance, they seem to be quite the opposite.

Efficiency - The Kingdom is not efficient. God is patient toward us, not willing that any should perish. If God's goal were efficiency, he would not use flawed human beings like us...
Predictability - Following Jesus is not predictable... The adventure of faith requires trust, not predictability.
Calculability - nothing fast and cheap about the gospel. Jesus gave his very life for the Kingdom, and God calls us to do the same...
Control - don't see this one either. The Kingdom is based on relationships of trust. Although God controls everything, he still stands at the door and knocks... relationships of trust, not automatic door openers!

What do you think? I wonder how much of our church culture has been affected by McDonalds... Lord, please give us a better understanding of the Kingdom and what it should look like here and now... A community under the rule of King Jesus.

One Thing is Needful

2007-12-28T00:31:00.000-05:00

Worship doesn't just happen... you have to fight for it sometimes.

The last few months have been full months. Good months, but full of work, travel, friendships... going in and out of multiple little worlds of my existence. And sometimes in all of it I forget the heart of worship, of Soli Deo, of simply enjoying Jesus...the sweetness of surrender, the freedom that comes from repentance, the joy of walking in His Spirit moment by moment. I catch myself going through the motions of prayer, Bible reading, church... but somehow God seems distant.

I try to seek God, but I find myself distracted by many things. I have a mental list of things I would like to hear from God, a list of things I want to talk with Him about, problems that I would like Him to solve. I desperately want the fruit of the Spirit in my life - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control, and yet I know that it is lacking on so many levels. I'm frustrated with myself for not being a better Christian, for being so sinful and prideful. Deja vou. I've been here before. That feeling of hopelessness, like what I can do is never enough. I hate that feeling, but I can't shake it.

I am like Martha, trying to do all the right things to hold things together, meet the expectations of myself and others, and serve Jesus. Trying to be responsible, and yet feeling frazzled in the process. Instead of being content simply to be in relationship with Jesus, I fall into self-pity and a complaining spirit. An anxious spirit replaces the trusting one, and like Martha I wonder why Jesus isn't getting more people to help me do "His work." Suddenly, it has become all about me and what I want from God instead of all about HIM.

And then I hear Jesus' kind rebuke, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." (see Luke 10:38-42)

Mary chose worship. She made a conscious choice to spend time with Jesus. Joseph S. Carroll observes in his book How to Worship Jesus Christ, "You can never drift into being a Mary. You can always drift into being a Martha. All you have to do is just let yourself go. No woman ever drifted into being a Mary." (27)

So, how do we do that? How do we be Marys? How can I maintain a life entirely focused around Jesus Christ, with everything else coming in as a distant second? To know Christ, to dwell in the presence of the Most High God - this one thing I desire!

"...One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.
...My heart says to you, 'Seek his face!' Your face, LORD, I will seek.
...Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." ~ King David, Psalm 27

God longs for our worship. Jesus told the woman at the well that God was seeking those who would worship Him in Spirit and in truth. Intimate fellowship with our God - we were made for this, we were made to worship. How do we live a lives centered around Jesus, lives of worship? What does that look like? If one thing is needful, and we miss that one thing... then what are we doing?

God, teach me to worship You in Spirit and in Truth. Thank you for creating me to worship and for making this possible through the sacrifice of Jesus! Thank you for your grace and patience with me, for your redeeming love. I love you. Oh, for grace to love You more!

Singleness: God's Gift to Us?

2007-10-21T21:32:00.001-05:00

I've been thinking a lot about singleness recently... maybe it's because I've been as single as a person can be for most of my life...ok, for all of my life. I've never known what it's like to be in love, never been pursued by a guy. Sometimes, I'm grateful for this. Other times... frustrated, hurt, even angry.

In my insecurity, I wonder, "Why? Is there something wrong with me? Is there something that God is trying to teach me that I haven't learned yet?" I feel rejected, and like I'm somehow not enough. Lies, most of them... but they seem so true!

I've heard the answers a thousand times, and I've told them to others a thousand times... "There's nothing wrong with you. Guy's are sometimes intimidated. Be more open. No good thing will God withhold from them who walk uprightly... Wait on God's timing." Some of the answers are true, and some of them are just well-meaning platitudes or advice. I try to sort through them in my mind and in my heart.

Wanting desperately to trust God, yet wanting to be honest too. Why the restlessness? Why the pain in loneliness?

I've had a few thoughts on the matter... take them for what they are, thoughts... I'm writing them down so that I can re-read them later.

Singleness has been God's gift to me. It's not what I asked for, not what I thought I wanted. But for some reason, God has intentionally put it in my life at this time for my good and for His glory. I can rest in that and rejoice in it, because I know my Father is good. He is the author of pleasure, not the enemy of it.

That verse from Psalms is true, "No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly." This means that God gives us everything we need to glorify Him and to be happy at any stage in life - whatever our circumstances. He has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places.

Secondly, the pain has been a cause of brokenness in my life. God uses many things in our lives, in His love, to break us and demonstrate His love for us... it could be singleness or it could be a difficult marriage, the loss of someone you love, a hard job situation, or not having work, or not being able to have children, or any other number of shattered dreams that we encounter in life. And in this brokenness, he calls us to run to Him... to cry on His shoulder and to let Him carry our burdens.

Yes, I do wish that I had a real shoulder to cry on sometimes instead of just a heavenly one. Sometimes, God gives that to me. Sometimes He doesn't. But He has always been faithful to meet me and to supply my every need - spiritually, physically, and emotionally. Jesus has bought me flowers and taken me on dates... even bought me jewelry once!

Someday, God may give me a husband through whom I can experience His greater love for me. But today, He has given me Himself... and, at the risk of being cliche, He IS enough!

Impatience & Unbelief

2007-10-16T12:35:00.000-05:00

I used to think I was a patient person. But, I'm not... I want to be, but so often I'm not. I subconsciously wish that the world revolved around me and that I could make everyone happy, including myself, all of the time. Wouldn't that be lovely?

But it doesn't and I can't. And I don't really want the universe to revolve around me, even though I sometimes wish that it did... Why can't everything go my way? Why can't I have what I want now? Why is everything so hard?

John Piper traces the sin of impatience back to unbelief and defines it as, "Murmuring against Providence when we are forced to walk the path of obedience in an unplanned place or an unplanned pace."

Even when I walk in the path of obedience, I often have murming in my heart towards God. The path of obedience is often a path of loneliness, or at least it has been for me in recent years. I complain about it being hard, about being tired, about being overwhelemd and alone. I indulge in pity parties that eventually (by God's grace) end in repentance about my sinful attitude(s).

The continuous call of the gospel is to repent and believe. To turn from unbelief, and to turn to God in faith, accepting the hope that is ours in Christ.

Believe what? Believe that God really does love me and He has both His glory and my happiness and my personal holiness in mind? Why is that so hard to believe?

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy, He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil, or fade -- kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls. - 1 Peter 1:1-9

Paul said that three things will remain - faith, hope, and love (1 corinthians 13).

Faith. Through my waiting and through various trials, God is refining my faith in Him and in His grace so that it might be be proved genuine. Faith is some nice feeling about God. It is deep confidence in the power of God to save me through Jesus Christ.

Hope. I've been born again into a living hope, one that will never perish, spoil or fade. Hope is not optimism - it is reality. Jesus has already conquered death and sin at the cross, and He will return on the last day.

Love. You were loved in eternity past when God predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, on Calvary where Jesus died for you while you were God's enemy, and at the moment you first trusted Him for salvation. You who have trusted in Christ are loved today as His sons and daughters. And, we will be loved for all eternity, when we will share in the inheritance that our Father has prepared fo us.

And yet God waits for us. He works all things together for our good, and to the praise of His goodness! Why is it so hard for me to believe this? To believe that God really does love me so extravegently and perfectly? Is it possible to live in the full knowledge, or at least a fuller knowledge, of that love every day? To rest in that?

Oh for grace to comprehend His love, to know Him, to trust, and to wait patiently for Him!

Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you. For the LORD is a God of justice; how blessed are all those who wait for Him. - Isaiah 30:18

Photos from Debrief :)

2007-09-15T00:37:00.000-05:00

The office, My sanctuary...

2007-07-05T13:38:00.000-05:00

Sanctuary—a building set apart for holy worship (c.1340, from Anglo-Fr). That is my prayer, that my office would be such a place. An office can look like such a manageable and mundane place: planning, e-mails, phone calls, meetings, and papers. And yet, it is so much more. It is where God has called me, and it is where worship happens.

I have much to learn in the area of the contentment that Paul speaks of in Philippians. Although it has been a struggle for me to stay while sending others, God has been teaching me over and over again that this is worship... and this is where he has called me. “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Phil 4:11-13).

Whether in the desert or on a mountain top, in the suburbs of Orlando or the streets of Khartoum, in my office or on the remotest corner of the earth, Jesus is always enough. My work in this life is to remain in Him… the day to details are secondary, and the results are in His hands.

Grace...

2007-04-14T22:47:00.000-05:00

Grace. I can't seem to get enough of it. It's my middle name and I still miss it. I cannot wrap my mind around it, there is nothing else in the world like it... the only place it really exists is in the Kingdom of God. I hope it never loses it's wonder to me.

A couple weeks ago I picked up Brennen Manning's Ragamuffin Gospel again and have been savoring it's message. It was written for "the beat up, bedragled, and burnt out. It is for the sorely burdened who are still shifting the heavy suitcase from one hand to the other. It is for the wobbly and weak-kneed who know they don't have it altogether and are too proud to accept the ahndout of amazing grace. It is for inconsistent, unsteady disciples whose cheese is falling off their cracker..." That's my kind of book!

Grace substitutes a full, childlike and delighted acceptance of our need, a joy in total dependance. The good man is sorry for the sins which have increased his need. He is not entirely sorry for the fresh need they have produced. - C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
My deepest awareness of myself is that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and I have done nothing to earn it or deserve it. - Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

You are accepted. Never confuse your perception of yourself with the mystery that you really are accepted. - Manning, Ibid.

Enjoy it!

2007-02-19T15:03:00.000-05:00

I've been chatting with my favorite little sister on the phone...

"Life is meant to be enjoyed," she tells me.

"How do you enjoy life?" says I.

"Meditate on the hope and our glorious inheritance... it really does bring you joy. Every challenge we have in life is meant to make our faith stronger. Of course you don't always feel like that, but sometimes you do. Life is hard right now, but it's an opportunity to grow in spiritual and emotional maturity."

'Tis true. We're going to work on memorizing 1 Peter... wanna join us?

I ran a 5K!

2007-02-17T22:08:00.000-05:00

Yes, I did... I've never run that far before, but I ran the whole thing.

All I Want for Christmas

2006-12-24T19:44:00.001-05:00

I wrote this last Christmas but forgot to publish it... :)

"When I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical conclusion is that I was made for another world." - C.S. Lewis

What do you want this Christmas? Gifts are great, but do we honestly need anymore stuff? I want things money can't buy--contentment, peace, joy, love. I long to know my God even as I am known by Him. I want to live by His grace daily, hourly...all the time.

To love God, to love people. Why is it so hard?

Over 2000 years ago, Jesus was born on the earth. This little baby grew to be a man who taught about the Kingdom of God, lived the principles of the Kingdom, died to pardon His people, and rose again.

Christmas this year reminds me that the Kingdom is here, and yet not here. Christ came. His Kingdom is being established all over the earth, but we are still waiting for the consummation.

I want the Kingdom of Christ to be here in all its fullness now.

Pressing On

2006-12-11T22:52:00.000-05:00

I'm up past my bedtime... the reason? My sheets are in the dryer. I had company not too long ago, so all my sets are in there. So, here are some random thoughts floating around as my sheets float in the dryer.

These past two weeks have been challenging. At work, relationally, spiritually, emotionally... exhausting. I know God is stretching me, and I am grateful for that. I know that my brokenness has a purpose and that He is glorified in my weakness.

In some ways I feel more alive. Exhuasted, but still in this marathon called life. I want to run well, I want to run better. And yet in the weariness, there is sweet rest... (yesterday I had two naps!)

"Therefore, since through God's mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart... But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body..." - 2 Corinthians 4

The fear of man is really annoying. I wish I didn't care what other people think, but I do. If I really loved people, I wouldn't be afraid or intimidated by them because "perfect love casts out fear." But instead of loving people, I want people to love me... why can't people love me? Because they love themselves like I love myself. I can't blame them for that. 'Tis a vicious cycle.

So, I'm learning to grow in love. "Love is patient...kind... never jealous or envious... keeps no record of wrongs... always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." That's the way God loves us--He believes in us. He loves me when I am unloveable, and is making me lovely. Oh for grace to love Him more!

"For God so loved the world that he gave..." - Jesus (John 3:16)

Grace: The Beggar's Kingdom

2006-11-21T20:46:00.000-05:00

"I was a fundamentalist Christian once. It lasted a summer. I was in that same phase of trying to discipline myself to "behave" as if I loved light and not "behave" as if I loved darkness. I used to get really ticked about preachers who talked too much about grace, because they tempted me to not be disciplined. I figured what people needed was a kick in the butt, and if I failed at godliness it was because those around me weren't trying hard enough I believed if word got out about grace, the whole church was going to turn into a brothel. I was a real jerk, I think." - donald miller, Blue Like Jazz, p. 79

"You just think you're better than us," came the accusation "What? I'm not better than anyone else," came my reply, shocked that anyone would think I was that arrogant. I looked around the group of fellow campers for support, but none came to my aid. "Well, you do act that way," my counsellor said in front of the whole group. "I... I'm sorry," I stuttered, "I really don't think that I'm better than anyone else." ... The truth is that I did think I was better than everyone else. I was a real jerk, I think.

I had just finished 5th grade and was up at camp. We were playing Bible Trivia... I couldn't help it if I knew all the answers. When we played charades, I would have our group act out random stories that weren't typical Sunday School stories (like Jezebal falling out of the window and being eaten by dogs). I had memorized Bible verses to get a camp scholarship from my church. But, I didn't really go to camp to learn about God; I went there to have fun. And, that summer I thought I already knew anything that they would try to teach me about God. We only had fifteen minutes in the morning for our time with God, and they told us what to read. It seemed like a game to me. That summer, I had my real quiet time after lunch on my bunk bed during rest time with my faithful King James Bible. I think I even talked to God about how misunderstood I was by my fellow campers and about how no one seemed to understand me. That was not a fun week. I felt very alone.

And so began the struggle that would continue through college. I didn't see it as self-righteousness... I honestly believed I was seeking the Kingdom. I struggled to understand people who skipped their quiet times. Is it that hard to read your Bible? Although I never voiced these judgmental condemnations of others, they plauged me. I longed to understand grace. Jesus had said, "Whoever is forgiven much, loves much." I longed to love him much, but I didn't really believe I needed to be forgiven of that much. I was a Pharisee, a Nicodemus trapped in the night longing to fall deeply in love with Jesus. But I wanted to earn this love, I wanted to repay Him for what He had done for me. I had so much self-righteousness stored up: Scripture memorized, ministry experience, books I'd read, and commitments I'd made.

I have only begun to understand God's grace. The gospel is messy. To accept God's grace, is to accept the charity of the Kingdom--a handout that someone else paid for. It is costly grace. There is no such thing as free forgiveness. Jesus Christ, perfect Son of God, died for my sins. I don't want to claim that, I don't want to own that my sins put Jesus on the cross. Do you?

"Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him." - John 3:36

Whoa, it appears I have two choices: a) Get over myself, accept this grace that cannot be repaid and love that I cannot comprehend, and believe, or b) Keep trying in my own strength to achieve something that is impossible, reject this offer of payment, and endure God's wrath. On second thought, maybe I am willinging to claim that messyness and accept that charity.

Our sins weren't the only thing that put Jesus on that cross. God's love did that. His justice demanded death in payment for sin, so someone had to die. God didn't want us to continue as his enemies in this life, die, and go to hell forever. Jesus died, so that you and I could live. Jesus lived, so that you and I could be holy and perfect and blameless before Him.

"God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." -2 Corinthians 5:21
"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." - Romans 5:8
"He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed." - 1 Peter 2:24

I wish I could tell you that I never struggle with pride anymore and that I live daily in his grace, but that would be a lie. I struggle. I wish I could earn it. I wish I could repay it. I still find myself trying to be acceptable to God, even though I know He is already pleased with me and sees the righteousness of Christ in me. I still want to do something for God, and then realize that apart from Him I can do nothing. I was so valuable to God that Jesus died for me. Wow. That's amazing. That's grace.

"He saved us, not because of righteous things that we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit." - Titus 3:5

Anything good in me comes from Him, and I exist for His glory. Glorious Freedom! I have nothing to prove, nothing to lose, nothing to gain. I deserved death and have been given life. What I have been given cannot be taken away from me, there is no recall number on it. I have a Father who's adopted me, an eternal inheritance in heaven, a God who loved me enough to chase me down. I came in filthy rags, and He took them away and clothed me with his righteousness.

"In exchange for our humility and willingness to accept the charity of God, we are given a kingdom. And a beggar's kingdom is better than a proud man's delusion." - miller, p.86

So, I've been reading more of Blue Like Jazz... and I like it.

The Heavenly Man

2006-11-18T15:44:00.000-05:00

"Don't pray for the persecution to stop! We shouldn't pray for a lighter load to carry, but a stronger back to endure! Then the world will see that God is with us, empowering us to live in a way that reflects his love and power. This is true freedom!" - Brother Yun(p. 287)

This morning I went to the gym with a book in hand, The Heavenly Man: the remarkable true story of Chinese Christian Brother Yun with Paul Hathaway. I have found that I can work out on the elyptical machine at the gym and read a book simultaneously, if the book is interesting enough, and it makes exercising much more enjoyable. I've been reading this book for the past week or so and finished it today after going 9 miles and burning over 1000 calories. The only drawback to this method of reading is that you can't really take notes or underline.

Brother Yun began to follow Jesusin 1974 at the age of 16 during the Cultural Revolution in China. His mother was the first preacher in their village, always encouraging people to surrender to Jesus. She could not read or write, and no one owned a Bible.

Yun and his mother traveled many miles to visit an old man who owned a Bible. This Christian pastor had already spent 20 years in prison for his faith and instructed Yun, "The bible is a heavenly book. If you want one, you'll need to pray to the God of heaven. Only he can provide you a heavenly book. God is faithful. He always answers those who seek him with all their heart." Yun asked God for a Bible for over a month and visited the old man again, who told him, "If you're serious, then you should also fast and weep. The more you weep the sonner you'll get a Bible."

After 100 more days of prayer and waiting, God gave Yun a dream of a man who brought him a Bible. When Yun awoke to find it was only a dream he wept loudly and his parents came to his room. They thought their son was going crazy. His father held him and cried out to God, "Dear Lord, ,have mercy on my son. Please don't let him lose his mind. I'm willing to be sick again if it will prevent myson from losing his mind. Please give my son a Bible!" The three of them wept together, and then heard a knock at the door...the same men that Yun had seen in his vision were delivering a Bible in the darkness of the night--God had answered their prayers!

You'll have to get the book to read the whole story. Yun memorized the gospel of Matthew and started reciting it in other villages. He had never heard anyone preach before, but thousands were coming to know Christ. Yun avoided being captured at first, but was soon imprisoned and tortured for his faith. He should have died. For 72 days he didn't eat or drink anything, yet God kept him alive. God continued to expand His church in China through the house church movement, often in spite of and even through persecution.

This book has both encouraged and challenged me to live a life of deeper depedance and surrender to Christ. We live in such a tolerant society, and so much of what I do is determined by fear rather than by faith. We are ambassadors for Christ, servants of the Most High God.

"The world can do nothing to a Christian who has no fear of man... I feel so sorry that many Christians live in bondage even though Jesus has signed their release form with his blood. When you've been set free, you should act like it!" (p.339)

Whacha reading?

2006-10-30T18:40:00.000-05:00

I used to read only one book at a time... and then something happened. I aquired too many books, and now I have a bookmark somewhere in an increasing number of books. Some books are worth reading more than others. There are so many books available, so many good books. However, it is difficult to discern the difference between a good book and a truly great book. I am enjoying a sabatical from seminary and a chance to tackle the books that aren't assigned!

What have you been reading? Any great books to recommend? Leave me one and let me know.

Currently reading:

1. The Life and Diary of David Brainerd edited by Jonathan Edwards
Genre: Biography. This is a long book that I have been reading since college... in a way, I fell like I've grown up with David Brainerd. When I first started reading, I thought, "Wow, this guy is depressed... but he is honest, and I can identify with what he's saying." I kept reading and have learned a lot. Throughout his diary, Brainerd seems to gain a deeper understanding of God's grace and a greater longing to live continually in His presence. Reading the diaries of a man's walk with God is almost a sacred experience.

2. World Prayer: Powerful Insighs from Four Mighty Men of Prayer by J. Oswald Sanders, J.O. Fraser, Will Bruce, and Hudson Taylor
Genre: Prayer/Missions/Devotional. I highly recommend this book for all prayer warriors or for anyone who aspires to become one (I place myself in the latter category).

3. Muslims and Christians at the Table: Promoting Biblical Understanding Among North American Muslims by Bruce A. McDowell & Anees Zaka. One of the best books on Islam and Christianity that I have encountered. McDowell and Zaka give historical background as well as engaging theological truths in a practical, deep, and gracious apologetic manner.

4. For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men by Shaunti Feldhahn. Nothing earth-shattering yet, but I figured it would be a good thing to learn. After all, there are a lot of men in the world and it would be good if I understood them a little better. :)

5. Blue Like Jazz: NonReligious Thoughs on Christian Spirituality by Donald Miller. Still figuring this one out...it's a good one to read before bed. I like the style of his writing, but the content isn't all that revolutionary. Definately a different kind of book than any others I have read. It reminds me of poetry, prose, and journaling combined into several chapters that compose a reflective book.

6. A Martyr's Grace: Stories of Those Who Gave All for Christ and His Cause by Marvin J. Newell. I'm always reading martyr books... good stories of God's faithfulness to those who were faithful even until death. It makes some of the stuff in Blue Like Jazz seem a bit shallow though.

7. Looking Back: An Autobiography by J. Hudson Taylor. Just orderd this one from OMF not too long ago. Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret has been one of the most influential books of my short life. I love Taylor's honesty, simplicity, and faith to simply take God at his Word. It challenges me every time.

8. God's Call by Brother Andrew. Another one of my favorite people to read... "Total, absolute dependence on God was and is the only way we can accomplish anything for him." Amen!

9. Uncle Tom's Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe. Here's a classic... I really appreciated the historical background and analysis at the beginning of this particular edition. Very interesting.

10. Good to Great by Jim Collins. The title rather explains the book, now doesn't it? It's a business book, but hey... it has some good things to say.

11. Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper. Read the title again, and take heed--don't waste your life. Great message, albeit the books is a bit repetitive. If you never read the book, at least take the title to heart and invest in the eternal.

12. The Pilgrim's Regress by C.S. Lewis. Great allegory by Lewis that reminds me a lot of Pilgrim's Progress. Someday I would like to read everything Lewis wrote, or almost all of it.

13. A Long Obedience in the Same Direction: Discipleship in an Instant Society by Eugene H. Peterson. This book was given to me for being a small group leader at Urbana 2003. If you haven't registered yet for Urbana 2006, do so TODAY at www.urbana.org. You won't be sorry. As for the book, I'm still trying to get into it.

14. Born for Battle: 31 Studies on Spiritual Warfare by R. Arthur Mathews. Great book on spiritual warfare. If you haven't noticed, we are in a battle... get ya armor on and let's get fighting!

15. More to be Desired than Gold by Christy Wilson. Good stories and encouraging.

16. Spiritual Leadership: Principles of Excellence for Every Believer by J. Oswald Sanders. I had this book recommended to me by several people, and now I understand why. It goes in the great category with Scriptual principles, clearly articulated, minus the fluff.

17. Absolute Surrender by Andrew Murray. Oh, good book...

18. Operation World. I don't think I've ever read the whole thing, but I've been reading it on and off since I was a kid. This book is a must for any world Christian.

Re-reading... all of these would be in the great books category (in my humble opinion, that's why I'm re-reading them!)

1. Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster. It's a classic. I read it in highschool and now I'm re-reading it. Well-written, good principles.

2. They Found the Secret by V. Raymond Edman. Read this one in highschool too I think. I stole it off my dad's bookshelf in the basement and I just moved it down to Orlando with me. Great book, very encouraging and challenging... especially if you are wanting more out of your Christian walk than what you are currently experiencing. Go deeper--ther is more.

3. Not Even a Hint: Guarding your heart against lust by Joshua Harris. I've read several books by Josh Harris, but I think this is the best one. It addresses the heart of the matter with Biblical truth and brutal honesty that lead to freedom. When grace and truth unite, it is powerful.

4. Lost Women of the Bible: Finding strength & significance through their stories by Carolyn Custis James. I read this one earlier in the year and now am re-reading it in a book study with several young ladies. So encouraging to form a biblical theology about womanhood, and so liberating in the most non-feminist sense of the word. God created us to be warriors for His Kingdom!

5. My Utmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers. Another devotional classic that I read every couple of years... once in highschool, once in college, and now again in Orlando.

6. The Bible. However many books I read, let me always be a student of this Book! Recently, I have felt so ignorant, hungry, wanted more of His truth to penetrate into my heart. Today I was in Lamentations and Acts.

Recruiting!

2006-10-23T22:25:00.000-05:00

Our last night at the Moody conference... fun times.

"Tell us your story!" Listening intently...

Across the room from us was...Jordan! Jordan and I grew up at church together and his family lives three doors down from now. Jordan Root is CAM International's poster boy!

Did you know? ...It usually takes a person 8 years from the time they decide to serve overseas until the time they actually get there?
It was such a blessing to meet with a number of people whom God is preparing for His service.

Ask the Lord of the harvest to send out more workers for His harvest!

Join us in reaching the unreached!

Giza, Egypt

2006-10-23T22:11:00.001-05:00

Yes, I've been to the pyramids... ...and they are quite impressive. A lot of building for one small room!

Let my people go!

Sudan

2006-09-28T18:02:00.000-05:00

Sudan has three distinct areas within its borders: the north, the south, and the west (Darfur). My time was spent in the north, the city of Khartoum. Khartoum is one of the safest cities in the world. Under shariah Islamic law, there is no alcohol and there are no guns. Although it is a peaceful city, it is not a peaceful nation.

While Lesley and I were there, the government dispatched 10,000 troups out to the Darfur region. There have been civil wars between the north and the south and between the north and the west. The south signed the peace treaty last year, but the west did not. Since the west did not, the government has continued to send troops to the Darfur region and does not want any "peace-keeping forces" in the region even though the African Union (AU) has mandated them. As of September, the Sudanese government is still bombing villages in the Darfur region. The violence has has gotten worse in the last month. Pray that relief would come to the Darfur region, which has been ravaged by war for years. Pray that a peace agreement will be reached and that the bombings will end. Ask that God's kingdom would come all over this country.

Sudan is not an easy place to live. We had a lot of "one thing days." If you accomplish one thing a day, it is a big deal and you should consider youself productive. The concept of siestas is not unique to Spain. It is part of Sudanese culture as well. After lunch, in the heat of the day, take a rest for a few hours. Then stay up late and work after the sun goes down. It is hot, VERY hot and very dirty. There is dust everywhere. One night, we got caught in a kaboob, a dust storm of wind and dirt. This kaboob was accompanied by rain, so it really seemed like it was raining mud!

Aaron and Corrie took Lesley and me to their Arabic language lesson... asalaam alaikum! There are some Arabic phrases that will remain etched within my memory.

The streets of Khartoum...

The Blue Nile. The Blue Nile and the White Nile join and become the Nile River that goes up into Egypt. You know what they say, "Once you've drunk from the Nile, you always come back for more."
Another shot of the Nile. Notice the flooding along the banks.
Dinner with Lesley, Aaron, Corrie, and their daughter Hailey.
Hailey!!Tea with the neighbors... the Sudanese are very hospitable.

Ancient Petra

2006-09-26T17:12:00.000-05:00

We left early on our last day to visit ancient Petra for a few hours. These pictures can't capture it and these words cannot describe it. I felt a whole lot more sympathy for Moses and the Israelites after hiking through the desert. It is hot, it is dry, it makes one thirsty. My tevas were covered in fine dust in no time at all. But it was BE-A-Utiful.

The sun rises over ancient Petra...

The sun continues to rise as we climb... lots and lots of rock!

"He maketh my feet like hind's feet on high places..." :)

After a few hours and hundreds of stone steps, we arrived at the top of the mountain.

The view reminded me of the Grand Canyon turned upside down... mountains and mountains of rock in the desert. Such beauty!

Other traveling companions...

More ruins of another anicent temple...

Donkey ride, anyone?

Jordan

2006-09-13T20:46:00.000-05:00

I've decided to tackle one country at a time from my overseas trip. So.... let's start with Jordan! In Jordan, I spent about a week at a conference with workers in North Africa and the Middle East. It was such a blessing to connect with these workers, hear their stories, pray, worship, and dream together.

"Upon this Petra, I will build my church..."

Views from the hotel where we stayed...

A few pics from Rachel's wedding and England

2006-09-09T22:25:00.000-05:00

The mountains overlook the ocean in Devon... English countryside at its finest.

The 300 year old farmhouse we stayed in for a few days...

A wee bit of fun outside after the reception in England.

Myself, Rachel, Mary, and Liz in England before the second reception in June...

Mr. & Mrs. Binder with their parents after the wedding...

My sister Mary and I after the wedding in May...

I'm back!

2006-09-09T21:30:00.000-05:00

It has been a very full summer with my sister's wedding, Edge, visit to England, Edge, field visit to Jordan, Sudan, and Egypt, and did I mention Edge? :) Full, yet very rewarding. Exhuasting, yet very exciting and also encouraging.

Did I ever tell you that last night I dreamed I was a muffler and when I woke up I was exhausted? If you've heard that before, its because it seems to be a reoccuring dream in my life. Like one of those nightmares that you just can't shake.

A week ago Wednesday, a dear friend of mine went to be with Jesus. Steve Clark, 47, was one of those guys that had a huge heart, a jolly laugh, and a great sense of humor. We used to sing in the church choir together, were on the same worship team at my home church, and even sang Handel's Messiah with a local choir back in the day... he was one of the "trustworthy tenors." He will be missed, but I'm quite confident that we'll get to sing the Hallelujah Chorus up in heaven someday.

Tuesday I had the priveledge of witnessing the marriage of Alissa Clark and Tom Wilkinson... a.k.a mr. & mrs. t.j. wilkenson. I gave a rather spontaneous (i.e. corny) maid of honor speech, but I still don't think it was half as bad as most of them. I will have to think of something more eloquent for their big celebration. :)

So the past week and a half has been full of jet leg, loss, grief, great joy, and increased responsibility at work. Leaves me tired, yet grateful. Overwhelmed, yet not hopeless. Possessing many questions, yet no doubts. Stressed, yet not worried. Ruthless trust. Sanctification can be a brutal process, a sovereign process uniquely designed by God for each of us to make us like Christ. Tonight I am hungry for more of Him in my life.

Topsy turvy values

2006-07-18T22:11:00.000-05:00

Tonight I read the following from an article by Eric J. Alexander on the urbana.org website. It challenged me:

"The fullness of the Holy Spirit also produces a willingness to serve in ordinary and insignificant ways and places. Remember the background from which Stephen emerged (Acts 6:1-4). He was one of the seven chosen to serve tables, to do an ordinary, everyday task in order to free the apostles for the ministry of the Word and for prayer. We do not know how long he did this, but that was his first ministry, and God proved him there, and he proved God there.
"I want to suggest that this is a lesson we greatly need to learn. I think Christian character is most tested, and servants of God are frequently trained and proved in situations of obscurity and in tasks which may appear menial and even distasteful. Coming from a large, urban church, I often have people askng for a task. "What can we do?" they say. "We see the need for ministry here. How can we help?" They want to help in some dramatic way. But what we really need is for them to wash the dishes after a church supper or sweep the floor. I remember a young woman who became a most fruitful servant of God overseas. The first evidence of her godliness which struck people was that she was faithful in the ordinary and insignificant and distasteful tasks. We should not spend our time looking for some exalted place of service. We must first be willing to wash our fellow disciple's feet. "

I want to accomplish something great for God... like change the world, live a life of sacrifice, pour my life out for the gospel and for others, faithfully stand in the gap for those who have never had the chance to hear, and maybe be a martyr someday (don't tell my mom I wrote that).

While I'm thinking through these lofty goals and aspirations, I hear a voice say, "Wash feet. Be a slave to everyone. Love Me where you are, no matter what you are doing, and be faithful in the small things." Now, that is a challenge. I am going to need supernatural help to do that. It is only by the power of the Holy Spirit that I am able to confront the selfishness and pride within and become servant of all.

What a Wonderful Day

2006-05-28T15:31:00.000-05:00

Yesterday my sister Rachel was married to a wonderful man named Christopher Binder. They seem so perfect for each other. Everything at the wedding was perfect and beautiful. It is such a blessing to see God at work in such wondrous ways. As one man said yesterday, "God gives his very best to those who leave the choice with him." Maybe I shall post a few pictures when they come in...if I can figure out how to post pictures. :)

A good crazy life...

2006-03-02T02:55:00.000-05:00

Sometimes life just gets crazy...

Ever feel that way? Everything is going slowly and smoothly, and then all of a sudden there are deadlines galore and an endless supply of good things to do.

I have lived in this new city for over six months; I must be feeling more at home because that familiar "feeling overwhelmed" feeling has returned. For the first few months down here I didn't feel as though I knew anyone or as though anyone knew me. That is slowly changing as friendships develop. Work is demanding yet enjoyable. Yesterday morning I led worship for the first time at one of our team meetings. My one class at seminary can sometimes be a bit overwhelming - I read the whole Pentateuch and study notes for a quiz I took at the library tonight. And yet, peace pervades in my present weariness...

I actually enjoy having more than I can handle. When I feel like I can handle everything, I easily fall into self-sufficiency and spiritual apathy. One of my prayers is, Lord, please keep me desperate for you and increasingly dependent on you.

When I was browsing through Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy, a lot of things stood out to me. One thing in particular was Moses' dependent leadership. God spoke directly with Moses on a regular basis. Moses enjoyed His fellowship, shared in His suffering of leading a stubborn obstinate people (at times putting his own life on the line), and obeyed God's commands. When the Israelites rebelled against God and challenged his leadership, Moses simply fell on his face. Moses fought God's battles and let God fight his battles. Moses lived a life of worship, a life of service to God.

I am so grateful to live in 2006 AD... the veil of the tabernacle has lifted and I can enter into the holy presence of God because of the blood Jesus Christ shed at the cross and the righteousness of Jesus Christ imputed to me. I have a priest who is greater than Moses or Abraham... I have a Father who loves me enough to discipline me... a Friend who is always with me... and the Holy Spirit within me. He gives me strength and wisdom when I have very little of my own. I am a daughter, a princess of the King of kings.

So, sometimes life gets crazy... and I'm grateful.

Being Mocked: The Essence of Christ’s Work, not Muhammad’s

2006-02-08T23:06:00.000-05:00

A friend sent me this article and I deem it "blog worthy." May you be blessed and challenged as you read. Thoughts?

February 8, 2006 — Fresh Words Edition
By John Piper
Permanent Link
February 8, 2006

What we saw this past week in the Islamic demonstrations over the Danish cartoons of Muhammad was another vivid depiction of the difference between Muhammad and Christ, and what it means to follow each. Not all Muslims approve the violence. But a deep lesson remains: The work of Muhammad is based on being honored and the work of Christ is based on being insulted. This produces two very different reactions to mockery.

If Christ had not been insulted, there would be no salvation. This was his saving work: to be insulted and die to rescue sinners from the wrath of God. Already in the Psalms the path of mockery was promised: “All who see me mock me; they make mouths at me; they wag their heads” (Psalm 22:7). “He was despised and rejected by men . . . as one from whom men hide their faces . . . and we esteemed him not” (Isaiah 53:3).

When it actually happened it was worse than expected. “They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and twisting together a crown of thorns, they put it on his head. . . . And kneeling before him, they mocked him, saying, ‘Hail, King of the Jews!’ And they spit on him” (Matthew 27:28-30). His response to all this was patient endurance. This was the work he came to do. “Like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth” (Isaiah 53:7).

This was not true of Muhammad. And Muslims do not believe it is true of Jesus. Most Muslims have been taught that Jesus was not crucified. One Sunni Muslim writes, “Muslims believe that Allah saved the Messiah from the ignominy of crucifixion.”1 Another adds, “We honor [Jesus] more than you [Christians] do. . . . We refuse to believe that God would permit him to suffer death on the cross.”2 An essential Muslim impulse is to avoid the “ignominy” of the cross.

That’s the most basic difference between Christ and Muhammad and between a Muslim and a follower of Christ. For Christ, enduring the mockery of the cross was the essence of his mission. And for a true follower of Christ enduring suffering patiently for the glory of Christ is the essence of obedience. “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account” (Matthew 5:11). During his life on earth Jesus was called a bastard (John 8:41), a drunkard (Matthew 11:19), a blasphemer (Matthew 26:65), a devil (Matthew 10:25); and he promised his followers the same: “If they have called the master of the house Beelzebul, how much more will they malign those of his household” (Matthew 10:25).

The caricature and mockery of Christ has continued to this day. Martin Scorsese portrayed Jesus in The Last Temptation of Christ as wracked with doubt and beset with sexual lust. Andres Serrano was funded by the National Endowment for the Arts to portray Jesus on a cross sunk in a bottle of urine. The Da Vinci Code portrays Jesus as a mere mortal who married and fathered children.

How should his followers respond? On the one hand, we are grieved and angered. On the other hand, we identify with Christ, and embrace his suffering, and rejoice in our afflictions, and say with the apostle Paul that vengeance belongs to the Lord, let us love our enemies and win them with the gospel. If Christ did his work by being insulted, we must do ours likewise.

When Muhammad was portrayed in twelve cartoons in the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten, the uproar across the Muslim world was intense and sometimes violent. Flags were burned, embassies were torched, and at least one Christian church was stoned. The cartoonists went into hiding in fear for their lives, like Salman Rushdie before them. What does this mean?

It means that a religion with no insulted Savior will not endure insults to win the scoffers. It means that this religion is destined to bear the impossible load of upholding the honor of one who did not die and rise again to make that possible. It means that Jesus Christ is still the only hope of peace with God and peace with man. And it means that his followers must be willing to “share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death” (Philippians 3:10).

Footnotes
1 Badru D. Kateregga and David W. Shenk, Islam and Christianity: A Muslim and a Christian in Dialogue (Nairobi: Usima Press, 1980), p. 141.
2 Quoted from The Muslim World in J. Dudley Woodberry, editor, Muslims and Christians on the Emmaus Road (Monrovia, CA: MARC, 1989), p. 164.

© 2006 Desiring God

The Second Challenge

2006-01-17T22:01:00.000-05:00

Now comes the second challenging: writing a second post that is blog worthy! Oh, the pressure. At the risk of not being profound, I shall proceed. I could write about me, but who wants to listen to someone rattle on about themselves? My life isn't that exciting.

I have thinking about Africa a lot lately... North Africa, West Africa, East Africa. It is a big continent containing thousands of tribal, animist, Christian, and Muslim peoples. There are still over a thousand "unreached tribes" that have never heard the gospel. The last couple months I have been reading a biography of Dr. David Livingstone and the autobiography of Dr. Helen Rosavere. Two very different people in two very different times who loved Africa very much. But more than that, they both understood the call to suffering and the priveledge of sacrifice for the Kingdom... like Paul did.

"Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I do my share on behalf of His body, which is the church, in filling up what is lacking in Christ's afflictions." - Paul (Colossians 1:24)

I heard Piper talk about this verse a little recently. What is lacking in the sufferings of Christ? Not the propitiation, but the propogation. The call to follow Christ, is the call to suffer with Him. We are the Body of Christ, the physical presence and demonstration of Christ's love here on earth.

"That I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death..." - Paul (Philippians 3:10)

What am I suffering for right now? Is what I'm living for worth dying for... being confirmed to His death? Do we avoid suffering or embrace it? Do you have a solid theology of suffering, an understanding of God that includes a God that not only permits but also ordains suffering as part of his glorious redemptive plan for humanity? I need to get a better theology of suffering.

The purpose of the creation was for God to display the greatness of the glory of His grace in Christ Jesus. Without suffering, there would be no grace. Without suffering, we cannot expect to be ambassadors of that unconditional love and amazing grace to a hurting world that lives in rebellion. Lord, give us the grace to know You, in the power and boldness of your resurrection, and in the fellowship of your sufferings that Your name might be glorified in the uttermost parts of the earth.

What does that mean on a practical level? It means a quiet excitement intrinsically tied to larger hope in the midst of suffering. It is the deep knowledge that God does work all things together for good, even suffering. It means freedom to take risks, freedom to make mistakes, freedom to love the unloveable, freedom to die, freedom to be love and be hurt, freedom to cry on God's shoulder... freedom to live. What a gospel. What a God!

Let's blog at the very beginning

2006-01-08T22:49:00.000-05:00

Dear friends, I have entered the year 2006 with a blog. This is a trial blog. I do not know yet if I am a good blogger, or a faithful one...but we are about to find out. One of my main concerns in opening a blog, is to have something that is worthy to write about. So, this blog will most likely reflect my life, what God is teaching me through my life, perhaps a few books that are impacting my life, and reflections on certain topics with which I currently wrestle. I intend to keep these posts honest. Your feedback is both welcome and appreciated.
All the best,
sarah